Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Bridesmaid - Etiquette


I know I have been MIA and I apologize, really. I have been doing a lot of networking and going to many meetings always trying to find as many vendors as possible. I am always on the look out for new ideas so I can be of better service to my clients.

Wedding season is in full swing and I love it and a
lthough many have already married, there are still some of you who are going to be walking down the aisle in a couple of months and are still debating what your bridesmaid should or shouldn't wear or who pays for what. Here are four of the most common questions/debate that many brides go through so...I thought I would write about it today. I really hope the following Q&A help you in making a wise decision.

Do bridesmaids have to pay for their own dresses?

Bridesmaids are generally expected to pay for their own wedding-day ensemble (shoes and jewelry included). Talk to your bridesmaids individually about any financial concerns, and tactfully work out a solution that suits both of you -- maybe you will pay for half or all of the cost, or you can set up a payment plan. Above all, try to choose a dress that's reasonably priced, or consider letting your maids choose their own gown. Give some color/style requirements (i.e., black and ankle length), and ask them to show you the dress for final approval (just in case it's a little too risque for grandma's taste).

What is the proper order in which to line up your bridesmaids and groomsmen? I was under the impression that you have them in the order of who is important in your life. Someone else said you put them in order by height.

This can get sticky. Do the height thing only if you care about that sort of thing for the pictures, etc. That might save you some grief. If you go the other route, though, handle the "you're important to me" approach with care. You don't want to ruffle anyone's feathers. Maybe arrange the girls in order of how long you have known each bridesmaid: family first, then friends, and so on. But you see how even this plan has the potential to hurt feelings. Maybe the best thing to do is let your attendants decide the order among themselves.

Am I required to give my bridal team "thank you" gifts? How much do I spend?

Think of it this way -- your maids are majorly putting themselves out for you. To remain in their good graces, show your gratitude by gifting them properly. Many brides give out gifts at the rehearsal dinner. Sometimes it's something the girls can wear on the day of the wedding, like a barrette or a bracelet. Other brides say thanks with a magazine subscription, wedding keepsakes, or special gifts handpicked with each attendant's interests/tastes in mind. As for a price range, it depends entirely on your budget. We think spending $25-$75 is a safe be

Most of my bridal party is from out of town. They will most likely need to stay in a hotel for two to three nights. Is it their responsibility to pay for their hotel rooms? Or is the onus on the bride's family? Also, would it be okay to split the cost with the attendants as a possible compromise?

Generally, the attendants are responsible for paying their own way, just like they pay for what they'll wear to your wedding and for getting there. And usually, if you have out-of-towners in for your wedding, you'll be able to reserve a block of rooms at a discount, which ought to help them save cash. Going halvesies is perfectly fine, but know that you and your family shouldn't be expected to pay.

Remember ladies, if you have any questions or feel confused about something please feel free to comment or ask here. Also, if you prefer, you can always send me a direct email to

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